Not that I haven’t heard from you for long. Its just that I haven’t heard you well for long. Lately our talks are summed up with the regular blunt gestures, somewhere lacking the substance I seek. The questions still sound the same it used to be then , only the answers have changed during the course of time. There’s this strange feeling of losing track of you no matter how regularly we might talk. Since the present seems less encouraging than the beautiful past , I truly fear about the upcoming future. Lately , It seems some efforts are needed to help us build that conversation and I’m not able to find the right thing to ask cause we have never worked out this way before. I guess, this struggle is growing strong with a depreciating sense of empathy for the other.
As all I know every story shared builds empathy between the storyteller and the storytold. Hence with recent irregularities in the series of our life stories, all I’m losing is my sense of empathy for you. Such problem didn’t find a place in the past since much of the trouble was averted with the excitement to share even the silly happenings that we care. Nowadays it’s more about keeping it brief and unornamented.
Earlier we enjoyed the leasure to talk anytime and everytime and now its about categorising it like the ones necessary to tell and not so necessary ones to compensate for lack of time as it is understood. And with the time passing by all the little stories are labelled not so necessary ones,and all I’m left with are the final conclusions with the absence of the tiny details making it hard to feel it the right way you want me to.
Don’t you feel the urge to pickup the phone and dial someone while these little incidences reiterate in your thoughts ? What’s holding you back ? I admit nowadays I see myself suddenly stop too. I’m still not able to picture what’s holding me back but at the end I couldn’t help myself but succumb to silence. And with every failure , all I could see myself giving up easy on to being silent and impassive. But dear I would like you to know I think about you and only you every time when there’s a story either Big or Small , Important or Silly as it can be, is dying to be heard. And with every such unsaid story ,I think we are struggling more to ask the right thing.
The truth is I’m terrified about the idea to have ever known you any less than yourself. And I always believe its you someone I can always count one , the one who would know me inside out, the one who’s not needed to be remembered of any moment of my past which he haven’t heard before. If any such unspoken stories accompany you in your solitude and make you feel like to be heard, the only right thing I would ask be –
“Do you remember me ?
Cause I do remember you.”