Mirror, Mirror on the Wall !

Mirror mysteries are always fascinating, Imagine the mirror that always reflects the obvious truth if someday shows up with something that you don’t believe in. It will freak the hell out of you.

“My mirror, you look suprised today.

 What’s the matter ? 

I see nothing unusual to my appearance that should concern you.

But your gaze somehow indicates I am unable to see the obvious right away.

Are you sure something is unfamiliar or is it just a mere illusion of yours ?

As I see everything is still the same –

The heart is no less broken than before.

The eyes are still dry and pale tired of crying. 

The dark circles can’t get any darker with the countless nights devoid of sleep.

The hair is all shabby and mess and the beard has grown long over the years.

The smile is invisible as if the lip line never knew it could get any wider.

The skin has long lost its glow beyond repair.

Then, What’s the difference ?

Your fear is driving me crazy besides you are the only one I could trust these days.

I wish I could see the difference and rather get suprised by you.”

As he drops his head down disappointed, deep inside he knew what the mirror meant to say but didn’t have the courage to acknowledge it. After all he couldn’t stop thinking about this girl he met last night and who seems to demolish these walls he built around himself again making him vulnerable and weak and he definitely holds no strength anymore to bare the pain again. This girl simply challenged his prejudice about love and the idea of giving up on someone he defined love was difficult for him to even think about . True love is meant to happen only once , is what he made himself to believe all this years. 

And the truth revealed by the mirror stood against this belief. Knowing the mirror would always reflect this inevitable change for forever now ,it is just the matter of time when he will stand in consensus with the mirror , he tries hard to hold his tears and looks back into the mirror but this time it’s with the smile of acceptance and the change is visible.

Do you remember me ?

This conversation was just hanging around the corner to finally intrude our talks but I felt to imprint this on my blog forever to help us whenever we feel that way again.

    Not that I haven’t heard from you for long. Its just that I haven’t heard  you well for long. Lately our talks are summed up with  the regular blunt gestures, somewhere lacking the substance I seek. The questions still sound the same it used to be then , only the answers have changed during the course of time. There’s this strange feeling of losing track of you no matter how regularly we might talk. Since the present seems less encouraging than the beautiful past , I truly fear about the upcoming future. Lately , It seems some efforts are needed to help us build that conversation and I’m not able to find the right thing to ask cause we have never worked out this way before. I guess, this struggle is growing strong with a depreciating sense of empathy for the other. 

     As all I know every story shared builds empathy between the storyteller and the storytold. Hence with recent irregularities​ in the series of our life stories, all I’m losing is my sense of empathy for you. Such problem didn’t find a place in the past since much of the trouble was averted with the excitement to share even the silly happenings that we care. Nowadays it’s more about keeping it brief and unornamented. 

Earlier we enjoyed the leasure to talk anytime and everytime and now its about categorising it like the ones necessary to tell and not so necessary ones to compensate for lack of time as it is understood. And with the time passing by all the little stories are labelled  not so necessary ones,and all I’m left with are the final conclusions with the absence of the tiny details making it hard to feel it the right way you want me to. 

 Don’t you feel the urge to pickup​ the phone and dial someone while these little incidences reiterate in your thoughts ? What’s​ holding you back ? I admit nowadays I see myself suddenly stop too. I’m still not able to picture what’s holding me back but at the end I couldn’t help myself but succumb to silence. And with every failure , all I could see myself giving up easy on to being silent and impassive.  But dear I would like you to know I think about you and only you every time when there’s a story either Big or Small , Important or Silly as it can be, is dying to be heard. And with every such unsaid story ,I think we are struggling more to ask the right thing.

The truth is  I’m terrified about the idea to have ever known you any less than yourself. And I always believe its you someone I can always count one , the one who would know me inside out, the one who’s not needed to be remembered of any moment of my past which he haven’t heard before. If any such unspoken stories accompany you in your solitude and make you feel like to be heard, the only right thing I would ask be –

“Do you remember me ? 

 Cause I do remember you.”

Congratulations!

Weddings and receptions everywhere, seems magically everyone found their perfect match. Talking love and tender emotions have suddenly become an act of the past. Here’s how I fancy a special moment would be shared by the sweet couple at a wedding ( an adaption inspired from e e cummings poem ).

So here you are said he

All for you said she

Can I feel you close ? said he

This much close ? said she

Time lost count as you walk down that aisle said he

History saved , I almost trembled for a while said she

Four years wait , we made it through said he

Being apart was tough , but I always believed in you said she

I wanna hold you tight for long as time said he

Just with care , I might squeal but that’s fine said she

Your beauty ! – ineffable and divine said he

I believe your eyes knows it more than mine said she

Warm and Alluring , thy words I feel said he

Its my heart in thrall to your irresistible charm said she

The pleasure I seek being with you , nowhere I find said he

The care and empathy you show , there’s no such kind said she

Is it love ? said he

Love , if you will said she

“vuoi sposarmi ? ” said he

“Sì , I do ” cried she

( Audience rise in applauds )

They were meant to be said they

Congratulations! said he

Congratulations ! said she

Oh Tears!!!

I call out for you to be my guest tonight.

 

Hi Tears !

Nice to meet you. Look at you, haven’t changed a bit since my knowledge of you. Might sound a little quirky, but I happen to call you today for no reason. Yeah and I’m completely sober and sane if you have such doubts now, and I don’t wish to demean the very purpose you serve. I know you have many more reasons to appear, but today it’s just you. I have vague memories of you associated with my childhood although the recent ones have been registered well. I suppose your occurrence has reduced with time, not that the reasons are falling short, it’s just that I have learned to hold you on for few. It’s always something else that occupies my mind and heart when I sought solace in you, but today let’s just talk about you. I fear I ever gave a sound thought about you all these years and I must admit I barely know you for real, how is it to be you? I mean all that enormous amount of human emotions you hold in that tiny little drop. I couldn’t possibly fathom the gravity of such measure you could carry within you with my inept mind. I’m just aware of the ones you shared with me, what about the billion others I’m oblivious to. What is it like to experience those countless short-lived journey of yours on billions of faces that you come across ? I mean a lifetime wouldn’t suffice to explore your treasure of life experiences. And I could imagine how rich your treasure chest would be as the stories collected over these years would be no ordinary ones. I mean tell me how intense would be those emotions,  on the face of that Survivor who opened his eyes to witness the devastating site of bloodshed after the attack, to be on her face while she couldn’t fight anymore against those monsters holding her against the ground, giving her pain. On that poor schizophrenic who is struggling hard for life to understand what is real. To be rolling on his face who’s unable to make her realize how it feels like dying inside.You equally stand for the better and beautiful side of emotions too like the one on the faces of those parents to see their new-born child after trying for long. On that artist for the love bestowed on him by the millions cheering for him, on this old proud face who retired from work today after serving his duty for years with sincerity. In those spiritual moments of  ecstasy and joy when they understand the philosophy of human misery. Your indifferent nature towards joy and sorrow reflects your egalitarian trails too. How different does it feel to look on whom you appear ? Like how big and strong where the emotions when the Mahatma shed one or even the mighty Hitler for that matter and how small where they when the kid along the roadside shed few out of hunger. According to Hindu legend, even Lord Shiva couldn’t hold on to his strong feelings, the single tear from his eyes fell on the earth to grow into a Rudraksha tree. It’s unreal to empathize your strength to hold such emotions in all these cases. I fancy about your different pathways over the faces once you drop out of the eyes and finally disappear for eternity. Like the ones emerging from the edges and running along the sidelines and finally getting soaked into our pillows, or the ones running along the cheeks till you drain off over the tip of the chin. Sometimes getting wiped off by hands before reaching the lips while traveling along the nose line , some odd little times you get to reach over the lips but you kind of taste a bit salty over the tongue. It’s better you don’t leave back visible stains on our faces , or else every life would have been an open-book to read. I wish you could be collected and preserved to revisit the emotions you hold on for. I wish you were vocal to we people to make us realise what’s really going on within.

Tears waited all this long quietly holding on to my eyelids to hear me and finally rolled away from my eyes like it always does.

​If I were you !!

So when does this battle begin ? It happens everyday, in every little instance. In all likelihood they’ll always stand to differ

He accompanies me while on my way to work and back home generally, fortunately he is free all the time and me on the other side simply occupied with my routines and other stuffs. It’s usually the same journey which follows everyday until one fine day it changed forever. Here’s how our journey began as we step out from my house that day –

Episode 1: We arrive at the auto-stand to reach the railway station .While waiting for an auto to arrive, He points me to this guy waiting behind me in the queue, looking at his watch every second impatiently, might be late for some real important assignment. He hints me to make a move upfront to help the poor guy skip the queue to save him some time there. But I somehow fail to gather enough courage to ask and I quietly slide into the auto as it arrives.

Episode 2: We rush to the railway platform since I’m bit late today. He distracts my sight towards this penurious lady sitting  with her infant in her lap near the walls of the platform, might be in need for some food to feed her child. He gives this look as if I probably know what he might say now but I disgracefully look down and make my way with the crowd as soon as the train enters the platform.

Episode 3: We catch our bus en route, today it’s quite crowded and I’m fortunate enough to enjoy this window seat. And suddenly he turns my head towards this stranger who is profusely sweating and exhausted as if he just ran a marathon to catch this bus, looks like he might need my seat more than me for now. But I simply turn my head back again through the window pane.

Episode 4: We get down at our bus stop and start walking towards our office premises along the footpath. He calls for my attention towards a skinny guy struggling to pull the loaded cart behind him on road . I carry this sympathetic look and simply enter the gates of my office.

Episode 5 : After a hectic day, we friends were enjoying ice-creams along the roadside. He asks me to notice the poor kid walking away disappointed, looks like he just fell short of few more coins to buy an ice cream for himself. I just stand and act like a spectator there.

Episode 6: While walking towards our building stairs, I usually avoid looking at this particular balcony. I know I will find this old little man sitting on his chair carrying that same old impassive look for years since I remember. I always struggle to make a comfortable gesture to him. Pretty well acquainted with this shortcoming he still provokes me by purpose. I accept my defeat and walk straight towards the stairs.

Disturbed with all the incidences he tried to indulge me into today. I make him stand in front of me and question his intent behind this play. His witty smile further gets me annoyed and furious. He softly utters “If I were you, it wouldn’t have been the same for you as well as for few others today,dear friend”. I just collapse down to my knees in tears because he was none other than myself in front of me. I was equally petrified with the one residing within me the whole time.  And there I finally discovered these two identities confronting each others.

Sometimes you need to lose some mind to win some heart.”

And they finally Broke up !!

“I beg you, Please don’t leave me, Dear. ”

But she didn’t bother to care, as she already made it clear.

I could see you move away from me, with every step that you take towards the door.

Unable to make any move, my body stands frozen to the core.

I felt like something just left my body behind,

And it ran towards you to hold you by your hand.

As if it knew how to make you remind,

That this love is not so easy to find.

But Oh my god, what’s happening here !

Its struggling hard to hold you back, but couldn’t make it even though,

At last I see my poor intangible soul couldn’t help but let you go.

Hello !

NO, I’m not calling someone here and not even close to something about Adele too, if you have mistakenly landed there. 😉

“HELLO”, The word sounds complete right! but still seems to be incomplete in itself, isn’t it. I believe things have never ended with Hello. It comes with something when called upon. And that’s where I’m interested in . We hear it countless times , and hardly bother to notice it specifically. It sounded the same each time but never meant to be the same.

This is what I managed to notice in there –

A “Hello” comes with love , when the old ears recognizes her son sitting oceans away and earning well for a living.

A  “Hello” comes with anger , when you make her wait at the coffee shop.

A  “Hello” comes with blush , when the new found love find reasons to hear from you.

The same feels annoying , when the customer care  disturbs every now then.

A “Hello” comes with joy , to hear from your little one who recently learned to say Papa !

The same comes with sadness , when your bestie ain’t feeling good lately  with the happenings in her life.

A “Hello” comes with freedom , when a resignation is all you need to breathe again.

The same comes with defeat , when your ego tried to ruin your year-long friendship.

A “Hello” comes with hope , to know whether your sister’s medical reports turned out to be positive or not.

A “Hello” comes with fear , when its time you confess to your angry father about the broken antique radio.

A “Hello” comes with acting too , when you want to hang up on purpose . Hello! Hello! Hello !

A “Hello” comes with Goodbye , but you still  don’t want to end up the talk, although it lasted till the dawn.

And finally , A “Hello” comes to get you people read this one.

Thank You.